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Trailer Tuesday turns into Teaser Tuesday as we have shorter than usual previews for ‘Pirates of the Caribbean 5: Dead Men Tell No Tales’ and ‘A Series of Unfortunate Events’. We answer request to review the first episode of ‘Westworld’, along with more news, emails, and calls. firstname.lastname@example.org
Apparently Whorey generated enough funds from his prostitution gig in LA to make another gay porn film. It’s going to be a gay porn parody of Space Jam entitled: Space Jammed Up Whorey’s Ass. It will star Whorey’s lame ass and his two Mexican sex slaves, Sammy and Ray.
Of course Sammy’s excited because he’s a big Space Jam fan and will play one of the Dongstars. Get it? Dong means dick.
I kind of loved the West World pilot, although I think it does ask a lot of the viewer. It’s very subtle and mysterious in its world-building. It doesn’t outright explain things so much as show everything in action and let you figure it out, based on your knowledge of the original film and sci-fi concepts in general. Personally, I dug it, although I can see why Danielle and that other girl would be left a bit stumped.
Pretty sure Ed Harris is a guest and not a robot in Westworld. Yes i know that the man in black is a robot in the original film, but he gave plenty of clues in the show that he is a human guest.
I am so sick of the supernatural shit in ‘Pirates of Caribbean’ movies! I liked the first one, but then when every single, increasingly bad sequel featured an overly complicated plot with supernatural elements overtaking the actual pirate elements; they keep losing me more and more. Why can’t Jack Sparrow look for treasure with a mortal adversary? Pirate films should be about the adventure, not about bullshit fantasy. The first one used that fantasy aspect okay but when it became a focal point of the series, it got old really fast! I do not give a fuck and a half about this series anymore, and haven’t since the second one.
However, I am really looking forward to ‘A Series of Unfortunate Events.’ I actually read all 13 books as a kid, I loved them for balancing creativity, darkness, humor, adventure, and even homages to other classic novels. They weren’t a God damn chore either, 300 pages at most, not a damn tome of 800 or so pages, like fucking ‘Harry Potter’ books; which I also read but found exhausting for their length, and gave up after the fifth one. ‘A Series of Unfortunate Events’ were a fun, easy, and interesting series. They looked like they were a cynical cash in off the ‘Harry Potter’ craze, but were actually quite different and more realistic. I mostly liked the movie adaptation from 2004, mainly for Jim Carrey and its excellent Gothic and Victorian style, but I wasn’t eagerly awaiting a sequel. It would have been completely forgettable to me if I hadn’t read the books. This Netflix series may very well do what the movie did, but even better. Though the Patrick Warburton casting is a bit odd to me too. He’s great, but I can’t unsee him as just Patrick Warburton. Neil Patrick Harris sounded that way to me too, but then I saw an image of him in makeup for the show. Now I think he’ll be a great Count Olaf, hopefully he can rival Jim Carrey who really was the best thing about that movie. The author of the novels is also apparently writing for the series, so it should be quite faithful and more able to take its time to develop the plots and characters whereas the movie was only somewhat faithful and a bit rushed in them trying to cram three novels into one movie. Overall, I am definitely giving the Netflix series a watch.
Wait, Whorey Coleman taking dumbass internet comments seriously again? Yeah. call me when morons on Twitter actually affect something like TV viewership, sales, or box office numbers. Name me one thing that succeeded outside of the internet or bombed because the minority that is the internet. Oh wait, you can’t. Way to prove how fucking stoopid you are Whorey Coleman. #FuckKorey.
Its pretty easy to tell who’s who in Westworld Danielle. The scientists are the ones in the lab, the robots are the ones reenacting the same roles each day and the humans are the ones making the huge deal about being at a theme park E.G the couple that were taking the pictures with the outlaws they killed. I’m sure this is subject to change but right now it’s pretty straight forward.