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This week’s sermon features the Top 5 Box Office, the best and worst superhero movie of 2016, the deleted Joker scene from ‘Suicide Squad’, the teacher who took the mic away from an autistic kid, sex that can be downloaded via Blowcast, a man dissolved in Yellowstone park, Trump demanding an apology from Hamilton, and emails and calls.
You thought you can get away with this right, Whorey Coleman? I just recently discovered 31,000 emails that were leaked onto the internet and you’re a sick fuck, Whorey Coleman. Warning: Some of these emails maybe disturbing for some readers.
Whorey: Yes, is this Walmart’s Mexican sex slave division?
Walmart: Yes it is. May I help you?
Whorey: Why yEEEEEEsss! I would like to order two fine Mexican sex slaves from that are standing out there on your parking.
Walmart: Which ones will it be sir?
Whorey: I really like the fat ass one and that Dave Franco looking one looks mighty fine.
Walmart: The Dave Franco one cost a little extra. Cause you see, that one raps.
Whorey: I see. . . Well I do like me a gay rapping Mexican sex slaves, it will do. Have them sent to my sex dungeon asap!
Walmart: Well do, sir. That will be 9.99$.
Korey Goodloser : Damn it Whorey, how could you steal my boyfriend (Gerts)?
Whorey: White booty is a thing of beauty =)
Korey Goodloser: You’re not going to get away with this!
Whorey: How could you make racist jokes about black people, Mr. Whiteman?
Mr. Whiteman: It was just a harmless joke. But what about that white lady, she was a straight up racist to you, so why are you giving her a free pass?
Whorey: I have no idea what you’re talking about.
Mr. Whiteman: She called you a nigger to your face. WTF?
Whorey: I still have no idea what you’re talking about.
Mr. Whiteman: Just because she’s a woman doesn’t mean she’s allowed to be racist, dumbass.
Whorey: I still have no idea what you’re talking about
Ray: You can’t psychically threaten my girlfriend. For the last time, she does not want my bootyhole. She’s is no man!
Whorey: What is a man? A miserably pile of testosterone! Enough of me, fuck my bootyhole!
Gerts: Please leave me alone!
Whorey: I WILL ABOLISH THE VIRGINITY OUT OF YOUR BOOTYHOLE!
Gerts: But, I don’t want to be your sex slaves.
Whorey: SHUT UP AND BLOW ME, PUDDING POP!
Whorey: Oh Sammy! I need you to bring a spatula. I’m going to show you my grill skills in your bootyhole!
Sammy: Why the fuck are you emailing me? We live in the same sex dungeon.
Will Valle: Um Whorey, after I woke up on the couch, my bootyhole is shore.
Whorey: That’s funny.
Will Valle: Damn Whorey, did you fuck my bootyhole?
Whorey: . . . . . . . . . . .
Will Valle: WHOREY?
Whorey: I have a soft spot for white woman that defend child rapists.
Whorey: Hello, Ray! Is your dick shaved?
Ray: God damn. . .
Whorey: Yes, is this the spirit cooking human resource department?
Hillary Clinton’s Cook: Why yes it is!
Whorey: Yes, I would like a batch of blood/semen soup. It’s seems to work wonders for my idol Hillary Clinton.
Educated Voter: Hey faggot, why do you keep ignoring the facts that Hillary Clinton is a racist that’s wants us to take us to war with Russia you sick fuck?
Whorey: I have no idea what you’re talking about. Trump is the bad guy because he said bad things about being a pussy.
Educated Voter: You punk ass bitch you’re not even gay. And how can you value being a fag above going to war with another country?
Whorey: I’m not listening to you! You’re an idiot for voting for Trump! *puts hands on ears* LALALALALALALALA!
Hillary Clinton: Hi, this is Hillary Clinton, I want to thank you for your support. But sadly your nigger-ass wasn’t enough for me to fool enough idiots like you for me to win this election. May I piss my pee and spread my blood in your food?
Whorey: Why YEEEEeeeesss!
Whorey: Here’s a rap for you Ray: Old McDonald had a farm, milk and cookies.
Ray: That doesn’t rhyme or make sense.
Whorey: WELL GOOD FOR YOOOOOOU!
Whorey: Hello Gerts. I’M BAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!
Whorey: Alright, you paid off the women that will falsely accuse Brother Negro of rape?
Sammy: Yeah. You think this will work? Again, why the fuck are you emailing this?
Whorey Brother Negro will pay.
Whorey: Did you pick up the wig and makeup?
Ray: Yes master. But Whorey, aren’t you afraid that the viewers are going to catch that “Danielle” is you?
Whorey: I’ll just say she moved to Thailand after Trump became president tee hee.
Whorey: I think you’re going to have to get tested. . .
Ray: You forget to wear the god damn condom. . . . AGAIN?
Whorey: Why are you voting for Hillary?
Sammy: Because. . .
Whorey: Because why?
Sammy: Because I think he’s racist! I starting crying like a faggot bitch when he started acting like a .. . MAN!
Whorey: What does being a man feel like? Seem like a disgusting feeling.
Sammy: Sure does. Viva la faggots! Wait a minute. . AGAIN, WHY ARE YOU EMAILING THIS?
Whorey: Did you use the money to bail Ray out of jail?
Will Valle: Yeah. What did he do?
Whorey: Oh, he molested some women out of frustration of him being my bitch.
Will Valle: Is he innocent?
Whorey: . . . . NO! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I didn’t watch Suicide Squad but after listening to that clip hell no! That music and that dialogue was just horrible
I have no idea how people thought Batman V Superman was worse at the time. That film is a rushed mess but at least it feels finished. Suicide Squad is like the world’s most expensive fan-film, directed by a 14 year old and edited with his feet.
Drumpf is the most thin-skinned person on earth. And we’ve known this all along. He’s going to be President and take more criticism than ever from around the world. For all the criticism Obama’s had to deal with, if he complained how Drumpf did on Twitter, he would get nothing but shit for it. What have we gotten ourselves into? The guy hasn’t changed a bit from his cluster fuck of a campaign. I have little reason to believe he will ever change for the better. Keep criticizing him though, he deserves it and maybe he’ll realize that being the President is not as glamorous as it seems. For all the outrage there is in the world, I don’t think anyone deserves more of it than our President-elect. Maybe he’ll resign with enough scrutiny directed towards him (which should have happened more during the damn campaign!)…but then we get 80’s movie villain Mike Pence. No matter what happens, these next four years are almost guaranteed to be awful.
Does Sammy say these crazy comments cause hes trying to be funny or what? Man, dissolving in a geyser is horrific no one deserves that shit.
Suicide Squad extended cut is ok but its not going to change anyone’s minds about the movie. I liked it, though.