Will’s Unpopular Opinion – Who ya gonna blame? – 3-16-16

When I think of the upcoming Ghostbusters 3, this quote jumps to mind:

“Frankly, there have been a lot of wild stories in the media and we want to assess for any possible environmental impact from your operation!”
                                                              -Walter Peck

Maybe it’s not environmental, (or maybe it is) but there is definitely a perversion of social mores being rapaciously manipulated when it comes to subject of movie remakes, and Ghostbusters 3 in particular fits that bill. Never in anyone’s collective consciousness can someone recall such an outcry of utter disgust about a trailer for a movie being released. (Except for maybe The Passions of the Christ. Even though both movies feature bringing people back from the dead…) Which brings us to the theme of this article…. “Mass Hysteria”

There is some borderline irony transpiring with the reception of the new Ghostbusters Trailer. (mostly bad, garnering 75% thumbs down on Youtube) – Similarly to the opening of Ghostbusters 2, where everyone but Harold Ramis’ character ‘Egon’, is far from doing any real credible work; between hosting poorly rated daytime TV shows and being reduced to entertaining nine year olds at kid’s parties…

“Ghost-busting is over…”
-Winston

So is that whats happened here? Are Ghostbusters just too old to reboot/rebrand/ repurpose, etc etc, for a new generation? Are the masses collectively no longer afraid of ghosts? Are proton packs… passé? Or is there a deeper seed of seething rejection to the new film and it’s attempt at stealing your money.

Granted I’ll say this, for the most part, people are consumers, and consumers don’t care that you steal their money. They want to give it to you!

“The franchise rights alone will make us rich
beyond our wildest dreams!”
-Peter

People want to buy T-shirts, mugs, stupid pop vinyl bobble head dolls. It gives them an elated feeling of accomplishment for their favorite franchise(s); a feeling that they’re now somehow apart of it. However franchises aren’t manufactured, they’re organically grown. You can’t build them in a lab. (Like studios did in the 90’s) The masses have become too self aware. Why? Because we’ve been fed this brand of garbage before. It tastes like wood pulp in your asiago cheese. Much like a white test mouse being served heroin in a cage, and then not…, we know the real stuff when we see it, and pushing a button to get a pellet without our happy treat falling down a tube leaves us in two spots; 1) We want more. 2) We won’t put up with less.

Robocop, Fantastic 4, A Nightmare on Elm St., Point Break, Total Recall, etc etc; The list goes on of completely failed, lifeless, tired reboots that felt as if they barely hit the ground jogging and clearly due to the massive impetus of each franchise, crashed and burned with no remorse. No one asked for these movies, yet they were still built, packaged, and shoved down the throats of fans and newbies alike. Even the few reboots/remakes/ re-imaginings (let’s just call them “regurgitations”) that did make it with varying degrees of success, were successful not only due to branding, but also pandering. ‘Star Wars 7’ boasted itself as the long awaited sequel, and has now been considered by more and more critics and fans as a marketing ploy to remake the original. ‘Star Trek’ did the same thing but in a more clever fashion, and even managed to change its audience at the same time, which was surprising and even commendable. Finally, I never thought I’d say this, but ‘Ninja Turtles’ may be the most successful reboot yet, if only because it tried to do something completely new. This wasn’t accomplished just through the release of the 2014 film, but by the broader marketing plan which included, a cartoon, a reprise of the comic, toys, and video games. It may be a tired story that fans of the turtles know by heart, but it’s how you tell that story and the risk you put into it. I will always reward risk and originality before anything else.

So have audiences had enough? Film, much like other aspects of ‘life vs artificial life’ has an uncanny valley as well. You can tell the real movies from the fake. It’s why you say things like “It looks like it was made for TV.” or “Who made this!?”. People can tell the difference, and maybe now like a person going through an organ transplant, the body and the people alike are rejecting this Ghostbusters trailer/movie. They can see it for what it is, and more importantly, what it isn’t. And a Ghostbusters movie, whether it be a sequel or a reboot or even a fantastic looking fan film, takes more than the theme song, a tricked out car and robot backpacks to make it ‘Ghostbusters’. It’s not a movie about guns and goblins. It’s about a bunch of guys who are their own characters with their own personalities and idiosyncrasies who go into business for themselves. That’s it. In the first 60 minutes of the original film you only see two ghosts. Two! The movie isn’t about licking your side-piece proton pack pistols or punching a ghost in the face!! “Fuck Yeah!”

The once quality of what was fed to people is now lacking quantity; bankrupting fans of enthusiasm and interest for further installments of any series they once held dear. Due to lack of interest, and caring, films have become ‘soylent green’, and it’s being fed to the public under the illusion that they actually asked for it. Nobody asked for ‘Point Break’ guys. However, yes, you’ll always have the loyalists, (every franchise/series does) but as these movies wean the opinions will ween with it. Hollywood has become the drug dealers of the modern era and the audience; the submissive meek mice pushing buttons for pellets are getting wise to the ruse. Industry gives you the good stuff first, then starts switching out the premium garb on you for the same price, and as the consumers looking to chase that first high in a constant game of ‘chase the dragon’, we still continue to allow it and the regurgitated reboots, and unimaginative re-imaginings that follow; forcing people to stand-up more and more in collective droves, screaming: “I want a new drug…”

-Will Valle

(Never has this logo had more meaning than right now…)